Awake My Soul

Over the past couple of weeks, I have read every blog, every devotional, heard every sermon, listened to friends talk...and every blog, devotional, sermon, and talk has been on one thing-changing in the new year. It's that time of year when resolutions are made and quickly broken, when there is a lot of talk and in the beginning a lot of action. I'm going to exercise, lose weight, feel better, study harder, make time for myself, make time for my family, make time for my best friend, make time for the Lord....and the list goes on. 

And then treadmills stop moving and exercise equipment begins to gather dust....We close our books and slip right back into our old study habits...The newness and desires to change soon FADE and we are left standing in the middle of a room surrounded yet again by the CHAOS and CONFUSION that led us to the desire to CHANGE in the first place. As I sit here ten days into the new year, I think to myself....How can I truly make this year different?  
I begin with this weekend. I had an amazing weekend in Charleston with family friends. A great weekend of blessing-welcome homes, laughter, tears, moments of great conversations, and moments of silence. While it was a weekend away at the beginning of the year, it came at the right moment and the Lord had His reasons for the trip. And then yesterday hits, Monday, the best day of the week....and all the WORRIES, FEARS, and ANXIETIES of situations flooded my mind. Today, I physically am feeling sick, hopefully not on the verge of some wonderful sickness, I mentally am drained....and I think to myself "Lord its only day 10....seriously??" How can I make this year different?? I can't even make it to day 10!!

And then a text this morning reminded me to keep fixed on Him and His provisions and I am quickly reminded of Scriptures...."So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day."(2 Corinthians 4:16 ESV) "But this I call to mind, and therefore I have HOPE: The STEADFAST love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning;great is your faithfulness." (Lamentations 3:21-23 ESV) "My heart is steadfast, O God! I will sing and make melody with all my being! Awake, O harp and lyre! I will awake the dawn! I will give thanks to you, O LORD, among the peoples; I will sing praises to you among the nations. For your STEADFAST love is great above the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the clouds." (Psalm 108:1-4 ESV) "Every GOOD gift and every PERFECT gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." (James 1:17 ESV)

This year will only be different if I make each day different! I will not change, the desires of my heart will remain desires, I will not be healthier, I will continue in busyness, continue in unfulfilling jobs neglecting the passions of my heart, I will not make more time for the Lord, make more time for my family, my best friend, change my attitude, make the changes the Lord wants in my life, if EACH day I am not taking the time to RENEW my inner self, if EACH day I am not realizing the MERCIES of the Lord are new, if EACH day I am not AWAKENING my soul to the faithfulness and goodness of the Lord, if EACH day I do not realize BLESSINGS from the Father and He does not change.

Each day I neglect fellowship with the Lord is malnutrition to my soul, is a day where I am not being renewed, where my soul is not being awakened. I can not and will not know the voice of the Lord, the desires of the Lord, what actions I am to take if I am not awakening my soul each day to Him and His Word. I pray that this year is the year that I and those I am closest to realize the awesomeness of the Lord, that we follow Him wholeheartedly where He is leading, that we do not fear change but embrace it, that we let Him lead, and that we do not worry about our own needs, our own wants, but we focus on Him. This journey is my own....but I have the accountability of amazing women of faith who remind me to stay fixed on Him and He will provide.