I can remember standing in the Nibble Nook at Bonclarken (our church camp's snack shop/picnic area) singing the old song, "It only takes a spark, to get a fire going, and soon all those around can warm up it in it's glowing, that's how it is with God's love..." It was my generations "Kumbaya." Sitting in the theater, on screen, the main character has a thermos of gasoline and a lighter, trying to start a fire in the middle of the vast ocean of snow, it only took a spark, and soon they were able to fend off wolves and stay warm. A spark, one little spark can start a fire that can burn for acres; one little spark can start a fire that will warm hopeless men in the middle of nowhere. A spark, can change a person's life for eternity...
All it takes is a spark. We each have these desires that lie within us, these passions that we want filled, these visions and goals and dreams that we want to see the Lord take and make His own. We each have this spark inside of us, that if we are believers, is to bring glory to Him in all we say and do. But life takes a toll on us; life breaks us down, jobs, careers, family, friends, the world in general begin to dim the light; and the light and passion we had inside of us begins to fade. We see ourselves becoming more worldly and less like the Word. Our passion and our desires begin to be lost admits the desires of the world. Pain, hurt, turmoil fill our hearts, life happens. And then the Holy Spirit with His presence sees the spark that is still there, flickering in the depths of our hearts, and He begins to blow on it gently, as to not snuff it out, and He begins to put kindling around it through the Word, through song, through prayer, through communion with Him, and all of a sudden the spark grows into a small flame and the flame grows into a passionate fire. The Holy Spirit rained down from heaven in the form of fire at Pentecost and that fire and that power is within us as believers, as the body. He is inside of us desiring to be a burning presence in our lives.
All it takes is a spark. Once someone has been touched by the love of Christ, it will linger with them, it will resonate with in them. Once you have experienced the love of the Father, you can not help but dwell in His presence, you can not help but to warm up in His arms, you can not help but to run to the warmth of His embrace.
All it takes is a spark. For believers, there is no state of hopelessness. In the movie mentioned, one knew the men were hopeless. There was no happy ending, no hope for their future, but we as believers live in a state of hope. When things are failing around us, when life is happening, when we are standing in the middle of a room with chaos abounding, when our minds are questioning and doubting, we have a hope. It only takes a spark of hope to remember it is not about this day, it is about THAT day, it is not about being happy it's about being joyful, it is not about bringing glory to my name but to His name, it is not about whether I made the right or wrong decision but determining that I will make decisions from this day forth based on His Word not on this world. It only takes a spark to turn a life around for eternity.“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house.In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven."
It is funny how the Lord works, I have three longer blogs I have started sitting in my edit posts as drafts and every time I go to write them, I end up writing on something else. But if you know me well enough, you know my mind is always thinking, I am always pondering and mulling over something. I want to know, I want to desire, I want to intercede. As I was waking up this morning, I desired to finish a couple of those blogs, but I felt the Lord's prompting to write on another subject, one that has been brought up in conversations lately....the power we have when we call upon Jesus, the power we have in His name.
A name, there is something powerful in calling someone by name. Parents spend hours and money searching for the perfect name for their child. They ask others' opinions, they read through the 1000000 Name Book, they look at street signs and city sites, all in search of the name their child will be given. Teachers will all say, if they are honest, there are names they will give to their children and names they would never give to their children based on memories of students with those names. In the Word, names were just as important. When Saul was converted on the road to Damascus, the Lord said he would now be called "Paul." When Jesus called Simon, He said to him he would now be called "Cephas" or "Peter." The angel announced to Mary that the baby born in a manger would be called "Jesus." And Even in the Old Testament, names held power and identity. Daniel's name was changed to "Belteshazzar" by the king. Names, they hold identity, be it through our culture, our family, or our memories. But what about the name of Jesus? What about the power that comes just through speaking His name?
As Jesus was teaching His disciples to pray, He began the prayer "Our Father, Who are in heaven, HALLOWED be Thy name..." Automatically, from the beginning of this prayer, we see the awesomeness, the reverence, the power we have in calling on the name of Jesus. To Moses, He said, tell them "I Am" has sent you to free My people. Power, reverence, awesomeness, we have it, as believers, we have the ability to call on His name and at His name even the demons tremble and fall, at His name mountains can be moved and waters recede. When we pray in Christ's name, there is a power behind it. It says, we believe He can do what He says He can do, that He is Who He says He is. When I pray and call on His name, it means I will do and I will say that which You have called me. There is a power when we speak His name, when we intercede and call on Him we are saying we believe You are the Sovereign Lord, the only Lord, and You are stronger than anything and anyone. We are even commanded to not take His name in vain and saying His name as part of a cultural cursing is not the only way to use His name in vain. How dare we even think of uttering His name with a deceitful and impure heart and motive. How dare we vainly use His name for our own agenda and purposes. When we are calling Him by name be it by Abba, Father, Creator, Lover of My Soul, Yahweh, Saviour, Provider, Healer, Jesus, Lord, Christ, Immanuel, Messiah, I Am....whatever name, we are saying the name of the Only God worthy of all power, all praise, and all glory.
When we pray, when we are talking about Jesus, when we are saying His name, may we all realize the power in His name, may we approach His name with reverence, with awe, and may we realize that the same power given to His disciples and followers has been given to us through the Holy Spirit, that if we have the faith of a mustard seed, that if we realize the power we have in calling on His name, we too can do miracles, we too can see prayers answered, we too can feel the peace and comfort that only He can give. In Christ's name....Amen!
Lent, the time of year where we all give something up...you hear people talking about their "sacrifice," you see it plastered on Facebook. But what is Lent....truly? And what is our heart throughout Lent and with our fasting and sacrifices?
Lent is the 46 days (40 without counting Sundays) between Ash Wednesday (which is today) and Resurrection Sunday. It is a time of self reflection, self denial, and repentance. It is a time where we desire true repentance, true changing of self, true turning from the old and beginning anew. It is a time where we can take away from our lives and replace with time and thoughts on Him. It is a time where we can become more like Him as He went into the desert and was tempted for 40 days and came out of the desert still the Perfect Son of God and Son of Man.
Lent it not merely a time where we deny ourselves chocolate, or sweets, or Facebook, or secular music, or alcohol because what is our heart in the denial? Are we denying ourselves these things because we want to lose a little more weight? Because we feel we have to give something up for these 40 days? Are we replacing our eating chocolate with prayers? Are we replacing our time on Facebook with time in the Word, being still before Him, and serving others? Is it merely going through the motions of fasting from something we enjoy because we are supposed to? Or is it because we truly desire a change in our lives and a turning away from sin? Are we grieved by the sin in our lives and desire to spend this time with him? If we are not using our denials and fasting in order to spend time in reflection, repentance, service and giving towards others, then our hearts are far from the truth of Lent.
A friend of mine posted a link to her church's devotional for the season of Lent. In the opening it states, "You can never replace something with nothing. With that in mind, it is better to not be so caught up in the idea of giving things up for Lent as much as leaning into the disciplines of grace— prayer, fasting, acts of mercy, meditating on the Word of God, the sacraments and the communion of the saints."
As we enter into Ash Wednesday and into the season of Lent, may we not focus so much on the denying of self for the sake of denying of self. May we not focus as much on what we are giving up as opposed to what we are gaining in time with our Father. May we understand the gravity of our sin but may we truly see the grace and mercy of our Saviour. May we prepare our hearts not only for Easter Sunday and the celebration of the Risen Son but may we prepare our hearts for the rest of this year as we truly desire to become anew in Him. May He guide us through this season as He was in the desert for 40 days, may we resist the temptations of this world and may Easter Sunday, Resurrection Day come quickly!
Last week, a sweet friend of our family had posted this prayer on her Facebook status. It was truly a blessing that I saw the posting, because I am limiting my time on Facebook, and I am not scrolling through my mini feeds. As I read, I realized that every thought, every word I had tried to gather and speak was staring me in the face. How many times have I truly desired to please the Lord and follow His will and then wondered if I was in fact following His will? As I sit here looking into the future and looking back at the past, I have so many questions and doubts and frustrations and confusion, yet all I desire inside is to please the Lord. When we come to a place of question, a place of discouragement, of doubt, of loss, where as the prayer says we feel we are lost, there is only One place we can turn to truly find peace, comfort, joy. I do not have all the answers. I sit here with the same questions and concerns as everyone else has, with the same doubts and wonders....but I pray that the Lord sees my heart's desire is to please Him, even as hard as it may be. May this be a blessing to those who read it and take it into the depths of their soul and believe the Lord hears those who call and desire His will:
'My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going, I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know thyself, And the fact that I think I am following your will doesn't mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing. And I know that if I do this, you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death, I will not fear, for you are ever with me and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.' (Thomas Merton)
Love, loving, Lover...I will admit I have never and will probably never be a huge Valentines Day person. While it is great to take the time to stop and show someone you love them, I honestly feel it is just another day created to spend money we do not need to spend on things we really do not need, and I would rather have the unexpected times with others, unexpected gifts, random notes of thankfulness, and the daily knowings someone cares and loves me, but that is personal preference.
However, I was reminded this year that love, that deep intimate, passionate feeling, is in us and is part of us because the Creator of man is constantly luring us, wooing us, passionately pursuing us. The Creator of Love is our Lover. It is so easy to see Him as our Father, our Provider, our Healer, our Saviour, but as our Lover, we as humans struggle. I truly believe it is because our society has so disfigured and sexualized love and lover that seeing our Father in the position of our Lover, we can not grasp it in our minds. Our society is so littered by broken homes, broken lives, selfish attitudes, sexually driven culture, that in essence we are scared to see the Lord as our Lover. But He is,He created love, He is love, we love because HE first loved, we can not love unless He is in us. The love the world shows is the love only given by common grace to man so that the world does not erupt into a total chaotic state. The love that we as believers show is a fruit of the Spirit, it is within us by our Father, the love of the One Lover of our souls. Husbands and men, how hard it is to see the Lord as your Lover, but what a challenge to love your wives, mothers, daughters, sisters with the love the Father has lavished on you. Women, you may have been abused by men, broken down, or you may be single and desiring to be loved, whatever the case, how powerful to know that you are already loved, that your Lover is Perfect and is looking to pursue you passionately. Instead of waiting once a year to love and be loved, let the Lord passionately pursue you. Whatever your view of Song of Solomon may be, whether you believe it is from a lover to another or from the Lord to His bride, whatever your view, remember He is the Author, He divinely wrote the words of Scripture, read it with a new heart a new mind. Remember He is love, His love is patient, kind, does not envy or boast, it is not proud, it does not keep a record of wrong, it delights in us, it surrounds us, it pursues us through nature, through others, through music, through whatever reaches into the depths of our souls. Happy Late Valentines Day...may the Lord love you passionately in the days, weeks, and years to come!
It is well, with my soul... Loss it is inevitable..."And after you have suffered a little while," "Weeping may tarry for the night." Loss it will lead you into a valley..."though I walk through the valley." But the Scriptures do not stop there, while loss is inevitable and it leads you into the valley, there is an unspeakable joy that awaits on the other side for those who believe. Without the hope of joy, there would be no end to the pain and hurt that loss brings, but as chosen children of the Lord, we have a hope that joy, joy will come in the morning! "And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you." "But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 'The LORD is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in him'.” "Weeping may tarry for the night, but JOY comes in the morning!"
If we stay in the valley of the shadow of death, we will never see the blessings the Lord has in store for us. Without loss, there can not be gain. We have to lose in order to gain. Think through this concept...Christ says, in order to gain life we must lose life. Practically speaking, you will lose friends when you choose to be different and set apart; you will have to give up free time in order to study and complete your degree; you will have to give all you have in order to follow Him completely; you may have to sacrifice time, money, relationships, and yourself in order to bring glory to His name; you may have to give what you have in order to bless another. Without loss, there can not be gain; so truly what does this mean? It simply means you will suffer loss in order to gain a glorious and blessed eternity in heaven.
I think through the past few years of my life, the loss of my niece was the most devastating, heart wrenching, mind boggling loss I or anyone should ever endure, but without her loss, without the Lord having a greater design and purpose for this life, we would not have gained the joy and the blessing of hearing those pitiful cries in the middle of the night once again, or the joy of watching a baby take their first steps, say their first words. Without having suffered loss, we would not have gained the blessing of my nieces.
If we were to only stop at the loss, if we were to only stay in the valley, we would be hopeless. If the Scriptures stopped at, "weeping may tarry for the night," and we were left to complete the thought, we as humans would never in our own power and strength say but "joy comes in the morning." We as humans would never complete the thought, but we have a Power that is stronger than anything we can humanly conjure up. As believers, we have a hope that the thought has already been completed for us, the journey has already been written, that nothing can touch our lives without touching Him first, and that everything that happens in life is for His good and is for HIS glory! "Weeping may tarry for the night, but JOY comes in the morning!"
Not only does the Word point to a joy that comes out of loss, or even can be present admist loss, but it firmly declares that after we have suffered, the Lord Himself, "will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish us." This verse was one of the first verses a former student of mine sent me via text message after my niece passed. At the time, I could only see the suffering, but as the days, months, and years have passed what a testimony to the faithfulness of our Lord. When a year and a 2 months after we suffered loss, I saw joy return to my family's face as my sister held my niece and they announced her name, when I can hold an infant and not think of the loss we felt, when I can hear the words "it is well, with my soul," and believe with all that is inside they are true, I know beyond all that He can restore, He can confirm, He can strengthen, and He can establish us. No matter what our loss may be, a relationship, a child, a parent, an illness, our finances, our possessions, no matter how small or how great of a loss, the faithfulness and the promises of the Lord never change, they are unfailing, they are new every morning He allows us to wake up on this Earth, He can do what He says He can do, and He will restore us. And praise Him we will be a little wiser, a little more guarded (in the good sense), but a lot stronger. "And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you."
A quote that the Lord showed this week states that "We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be." (C.S. Lewis) Life will be full of pain and hurt and loss. And sometimes to get to the point the Lord wants us will be painful, but "Pain and joy are arteries of the same heart and mourning and dancing are but one long movement in the symphony of God." (Ann Voskamp) So take heart, weeping and sorrow and pain may be here, but joy and restoration are on the other side. "But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 'The LORD is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in him'.”
Praise Him we have a hope that transcends all loss and all pain, only to Him be the glory. This journey is our own, each unique, each filled with our own hurts, but He is with us through it and until He calls us home He is continuing to do a great work in each of us. This was in a devotional I read this week by Joni Eareckson Tada"God is all and in all. Amazing grace, how can it be? That God would share his joy for eternity with me? Remember, God shares his joy on his terms; and those terms call for us to in some measure suffer as his beloved Son did while one earth (I Peter 2:21). If you and I experience hardship, it is paving the way for a deeper joy for all of eternity!"
I remember the first time, my freshman year of college, I had to confront a professor over a grade; I called my parents, scared, their advice, "We can't have the conversation for you." Great advice for an 18 year old who did not like confrontation; knees shaking, hands sweaty, I walked into his office. Four years later, I sat in front of my Head Athletic Trainer, about to turn down multiple Athletic Training Graduate Assistant positions...to go to China for a year, putting my career and my education on hold. And since college, I have walked into many a conversation where I was scared what the outcome may be. I have been placed in many situations, be it by my lack of discernment or by the sheer testing of my faith, where I had to find the words to say and not worry about what would result, but press forward in confidence and covered in prayer. Boldness, courage, lack of fear...."The wicked flee when no one pursues,but the righteous are bold as a lion." (Prov 28:1), "Since we have such a hope, we are very bold," (2 Cor 3:12),"And most of the brothers, having become confident in the Lord by my imprisonment, are much more bold to speak the word without fear. "(Phil 1:14), "Accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required," (Philemon 1:8) "Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” (Deut 31:6) Scripture after scripture points to believers being BOLD and CONFIDENT in our faith. We are to be as "bold as a lion." Think about that, truly meditate on the strength and power of that phrase...we have an awesome power within us to set ourselves apart in boldness and in confidence, and to approach all circumstances with the strength of the Holy Spirit within us; we can be like a lion, boldly proclaiming truth, boldly living in truth. What is it that you need boldness for today? Do you need to approach a family member and ask forgiveness? Do you have a professor who has wronged you on a paper? Are you involved in a relationship that needs to be changed? Do you have a secret habit that you need to expose to your spouse? Do you have a friend you have wrongly accused? Are you debating, as I was in front of my Head Athletic Trainer, the future, your career, your job situation, and you know what you should do but lack the boldness to step out and do? Are your finances causing anxiety and you lack the boldness to ask for help? What conversations, what situations are you facing, where there is a fear and an anxiety about what may result? Just as the Lord gave Moses the boldness and the words to say as he faced Pharaoh, the same Lord will give you the boldness and the words to say as you face your situation. We can approach the throne with boldness and confidence, seeking His wisdom and His words, and we can approach life with the same boldness and confidence as we seek to glorify Him in our actions and our words. Throughout the book of Joshua, the Lord constantly reminded Joshua to be strong and courageous, and what is amazing as the book progresses, Joshua in return commands the people to be strong and courageous. As we face a day of rest and worship tomorrow, may we turn our hearts to the One Who is able to give us the words to say, the power to say them, the strength to set ourselves apart and be different, the boldness to take on conversations that need to be held, the courage to face change no matter what the cost, the confidence that whatever tomorrow may bring He is still Sovereign:
"No man shall be able to stand before you all the days of your life. Just as I was with Moses, so I will be with you. I will not leave you or forsake you. Be strong and courageous, for you shall cause this people to inherit the land that I swore to their fathers to give them. Only be strong and very courageous, being careful to do according to all the law that Moses my servant commanded you. Do not turn from it to the right hand or to the left, that you may have good success wherever you go. This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” And Joshua commanded the officers of the people...
I'm sitting at my desk, two students in front of me, an athlete is hurt, in the hospital. They know medical bills are going to be outstanding, they want to do something, but not sure what. I gently guide them, telling them to pray and think, and they will know what to do. As they talk, they develop a plan, they see the need, they want to meet it. My sister is hurting, hear it in her voice, I know who she's thinking about, unsure what to say, I just sit there, all I know to do is listen and say I love you. Your husband has lost his job, you know all he wants to do is provide for your family, he's being strong but you see through the eyes and into the heart, he's hurting, you wrap your arms around him and hold him, no words are said. Your mom has a great job, but it is wearing her down, it's taking a toll on her mind, body, soul, and spirit, but financially it's a great job, she's struggling to know the Lord's will, all you can do is listen and pray. Your best friend is hurting, a season in the valley, you wish you could do more, you are unsure what to say, what to do, you want to help them through the pain, but how? How many times have you thought to yourself, "I wish I could do more," "I wish I knew what to say," "I don't do enough for you," "How am I supposed to help them?" We find ourselves sitting back and thinking "I don't know what to do," "I don't know what to say," and then we find ourselves apologizing for not saying and not doing what we think we should be saying and should be doing. It is hard when there is hurt, when you see needs and are unsure how to meet them. How many times have I wished I had the money to help pay for someone's bills or the words to say that will take the pain away? How many times have I cried myself to sleep out of the hurt in my heart I have for the ones I care for? How many times have I just wanted to take the pain and the struggles away from a family member or best friend and suffer for them? When we are unsure what to say, when we are unsure what to do, when we find ourselves saying "I wish I could..." "I don't know what to..." we need to stop ourselves and not let our thoughts continue. If we truly love someone we will never have to doubt what we are doing and saying, because everything we do and say is guided by the Holy Spirit and is being prompted and encouraged by Him. We are called to encourage, to intercede for, to comfort, to spur one another on, to put others' interests before our own, to lay hands on, and ultimately to lay our lives down for. As long as we are walking in the Spirit, whatever we do, be it in word or deed, will bring glory to Him and will be exactly what He has called us to do.
An email sent to your Bible study, a text to your best friend, a call to your sister....you are going through a hard time and you finally have to let it all out. And then you sit back and think, did I say too much? Are they going to think I've become "that" friend, the one that is always having something go wrong in life? So you quickly apologize for being too transparent, too vulnerable, too overwhelming...you feel you've probably been smothersome and bothersome. You are worried they are going to think you have become needy...and then you stop before you let satan get the door cracked even more...because you are growing, you are counting your blessings, you are leaning on others and you are leaning on scripture, so you turn back to scripture, and you read:
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort. For we do not want you to be unaware, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again. You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many. (2 Corinthians 1:3-11 ESV)
Maybe you have experienced moments where it seems others do not care, maybe you have felt that your problems were insignificant or blown out of proportion, maybe you have been going through a valley and felt loneliness, maybe you have been called needy, maybe your pride keeps you from talking, but whatever it may be that is keeping you from seeking comfort from others, you can not let it anymore. Scripture clearly states, "who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those;" Bless the Father who provides me with comfort so that I can comfort my sister, my best friend, my inner circle, my family...my friends, my students....I am comforted so that I can be a comfort. Do I reveal my innermost thoughts to everyone? No! Do I send just anyone the most transparent and vulnerable situations going on in my life? No! Do I need to apologize for pouring my soul out to my best friend, my sister? No! Scripture is also very clear about who to share with and who to confide in, and a lot of our doubts and insecurities have come through confiding in the wrong people. If they are truly your sister, your best friend, they will be there with encouragement and comfort, in all circumstances, and they will lovingly point you in the direction you should go, they will be the ones praying when you least expect it, and they will in love let you know if you have moved too far from the truth. You see, we should rest in the assurance that those who love us, they care for us, and we trust that they are there to comfort in all situations, that they do not see us as needy or bothersome, but as a sister reaching out for a hand to help walk them through, and they know that when the roles are reversed, there will be someone there for them, holding their hand out, ready to comfort them, through whatever twist in their journey life may bring. And the God and Father of all comfort, will comfort us, so we can comfort others....Amen!
It is well....with my soul? Is it? Loss it is inevitable. We are going to suffer loss. Each of us, at some point in our lives, will experience loss, and how we go through loss, how we react, can ultimately determine the journey our lives will take. Going through the valley after a loss, it is not easy. There are moments where you feel like giving up, there are moments when you fail to believe there is truly a light at the end, but through it you must journey, through it you must persevere. Loss it is inevitable...loss it will lead you into a valley..."though I walk through the valley."
If you have been to the mountains, there is only one way to the valley, down...and there is only one way out of the valley, up. Getting into the valley is pretty easy, for the most part, you are walking downhill, you aren't having to work too hard, and you arrive there rather quickly. Then as you stand in the valley and look around, all you see is one peak, after another peak, after another, and you have a choice, you either continue wandering through the valley or you start climbing back up the mountain. What an image of life, how quickly our life can go from being on the mountain to hitting the floor of the valley...a phone call, a conversation, the movement of life and the ceasing of movement, an email, a text, a foolish decision, a harsh word, a delayed action, an omitted action, a pink slip of paper, within the matter of seconds our knees have hit the floor and our life is thrown into a valley. We look around and we look up and all we see is peak, after another peak, after another peak. Loss it is inevitable...loss it will lead you into a valley..."though I walk through the valley."
It seems when the storm clouds of life hit, they hit quickly and they hit hard....and the keep hitting. You stand in the valley and you wonder . You wonder why is this happening? What have I done? What have they done? She doesn't deserve this, they don't deserve this, I don't deserve this. You throw up what seems like answerless prayers in hope that the Lord is listening. You feel like each time you make it with one knee off the ground ready to stand something hits you and knocks you right back down. You are looking around the valley wondering is there any way out, how long am I to stand here, and then you realize, the only way out is to climb uphill. Loss it is inevitable...loss it will lead you into a valley..."though I walk through the valley."
Standing in the midst of the valley, you have a choice. You have a choice in how you are going to react, how you are going to survive, how you are going to make it through. The actions you take and the choices you make will determine the attitudes and behaviors you exhibit throughout the rest of life's journey. Loss it is inevitable...loss it will lead you into a valley..."though I walk through the valley."
It is so easy as you are going through the valley to get swept away in the emotions and the moment. Feelings and emotions and senses are heightened, judgement and discernment are impaired. Questions, doubt, unbelief, fear, anger, sadness all linger like the smell of smoke after leaving a southern establishment. Bitterness can build inside that as it builds can snuff out any hope of joy and peace in the future. Relationships can become as rocky as the soil you are standing on and blame can be passed to anyone who is standing within firing range of your words and deeds. You look to the heavens and wonder is He really paying any attention to what is going on or is there something else He cares about more. You promise yourself if one more person tries to quote Romans 8:28 to you, you are going to rip the page out of your Bible and say it never existed. But then, you know there has to be hope, so try to search scriptures in hope of something to hold onto and you see scripture after scripture where the Lord is promising "good to those who love Him," "a hope and a future, not to harm," "a supplier of all my needs according to His glorious riches;" you read where He promises comfort and peace, you read of miracles that happened by just a touch of the hem of His garment, and you wonder why Jesus, why can this not happen to me. Where is the good, where is the comfort, the peace, the hope, the future, the supplier of my needs? Every valley brings you to a moment of choice, do I stand here and let the bitterness and doubt consume me or do I get off the ground, put one foot in front of the other, one hand in front of the other and begin to climb to the top of this mountain? Do I truly believe the promises of the Lord, do I truly believe that ALL things that happen in my life have come through the hands of the One Person Who is omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent, Sovereign over all, or do I let satan and his forces look at the Lord and say, "I knew she would curse your face" (Job 1)? Even Jesus, the Messiah, was tested as humans were, even the Lord had to endure valleys, God Himself saw the Son hanging on the cross with the weight of EVERYone's sin on His shoulders. If He can endure the cross, I can endure the valley. Loss it is inevitable...loss it will lead you into a valley..."though I walk through the valley."
You begin to look around the valley, you determine you are going to not wander aimlessly, you decide you are going to climb and you look up and you look around and instead of seeing peak upon peak, you see there are moments of beauty within the valley, the creek that meanders along next to you, the pool of water collecting from a waterfall overhead, the bird that soars from the cliff above and lands next to you before taking off again to another destination. You begin to count your blessings, you begin to believe again. You see you have a hope that can not be taken away. You realize that there is something inside of you that can not be taken away. You choose to be a joyful instead of miserable. You choose to quench the flames of bitterness. You choose to live in the light of the Son and let Him pull you to the top of the mountain. You push down the pride inside and you let your family and your inner circle pick you up, pray for you, encourage you, uplift you and intercede. You become vulnerable, transparent, and open, not with everyone but with those one or two you know that are your warriors, the ones you know are there for you not for their own good, the ones who will throughout the rest of your life point you towards the cross, who are praying when you do not know, who are loving and caring for you through all things. You realize that while the journey is unique to you, you have a faith, you have a hope. Loss it is inevitable...loss it will lead you into a valley..."though I walk through the valley."
One of my favorite authors to read is Ann Voskamp and an artist I am growing to appreciate is Christa Wells. I was looking today for a video of the song "Image of God" and realized there was a connection between these two ladies, Christa Wells wrote "Image of God" for praise and worship for Ann Voskamp, amazing how the Lord works out connections! I could not find a video and importing music links I do not understand yet, but I have copied the lyrics below. As we go through the valley, we have a choice, are we going to bask in our misery or are we going to slowly begin to regain the joy that once was inside and as a believer is not able to go away....as a fruit of the Spirit we possess it already. Loss it is inevitable...loss it will lead you into a valley..."though I walk through the valley."
"Image of God"
Bare feet stepping on glass
We break along life’s paths
Our fear and loss, we bring it all to you
Soul-breather, making all things new
You’re making all things new
We come in pieces
We come in fragments
We come discolored
To the foot of the cross
Our Maker sees us
All that we have been
Bonds us together
The Image of God
Clay vessels molded for His own
Shall we question him who holds
And shapes us, for His perfect use
Soul-breather, making all things new
You’re making all things new
Soil breaking for the seed
Seed breaking for the life
His life broken for the soul
We are remade whole, remade whole
As I have hiked many mountains, I have yet to be with anyone who decided to wander the valley as opposed to climbing back up the hill. This journey is my own but I have a hope and a future, and I know that as I go through valleys, there is only one way out...put on my shoes, pick myself off of the ground, place one foot in front of the other, and if I can't move, the Lord will hold me in His hands and my inner circle of those dearest to me will guide me. "When it is dark, God has us in the rock's cleft, covered with His hand. Dark may be the holiest ground; God's passing by."- Ann Voskamp
I love writing the longer blogs and I have a few in the works I will be publishing soon, but I have so many daily thoughts that run through my head as well that I am hoping to begin writing some of those thoughts down and sharing them intermittently between the longer blogs.
Last night, I was reading in James, an amazing book full of what I like to call "spiritual 2x4s," those passages that hit you on the forehead with conviction. The end of James 4 states, "So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin." Not a convicting verse at all....or is it. What a powerful statement! Whoever knows that which is right to do, whoever knows what they should do and they do not do it, that is a sin...for them, even if the action in and of itself is innocent and sinless. How many times do we feel the Holy Spirit prompting us to do something and we push aside the promptings? How many times do we feel deep down inside what we are doing is not what the Lord desires yet we keep doing it? How many times do we act in ways we know we shouldn't, we treat people in ways we know are ungodly, yet we still do it? How many times do we worry and are anxious? Are there relationships we need to change? Are there people we need to encourage? Are there ministries we need to give to? Are there other avenues we need to be using our money, time, life? Are there family members in need and we push them aside? Are we spending time in activities that may seem innocent but the Holy Spirit is trying to convict us? What are those things in our lives that we know we should or shouldn't be doing? As innocent and sinless as the activities themselves may be, if we are know what is right and fail to do it, we fail to change them, thus we are living in sin. We struggle to do what is right because our mind and our body is constantly in battle, we desire to live for Christ but we live in the world. We want to be friends with the world, yet we shouldn't. The world acts and lives according to one journey and our journey is to be different. The world is weak with everyone looking and acting the same, and we are meant to be different and bold. A friend of mine posted this quote last week on their Facebook and it coupled with this verse is a powerful right-left hook to the soul: "Whatever weakens your reason, impairs the tenderness of your conscience, obscures your sense of God, or takes off the relish of spiritual things- in short, whatever increases the strength and authority of your body over your mind, that thing is sin to you, however innocent it may be in itself." (Mother of John Wesley)
Bathing those around me in prayer and intercession, may we all strive do do that which we know is right and pure.
What happens when I set a precedent or an expectation I should not have set or the Lord did not truly desire me to set? For example at work, I work overtime; I overwork; it consumes my time, my energy; it takes me away from time with family, with the Lord, but because I've worked like I have people now expect me to do certain things and be certain ways. Or in life, I've acted certain ways, been certain places, behaved certain ways, said certain things, developed relationships that maybe the Lord wasn't desiring to go as they have, but because I've set the precedent at work, in life, or in any situation, expectations have now been set. What happens when I desire to change my actions and behaviors and set new expectations? What if I finally desire to set the expectations for my work and life based on what the Lord says instead of what the world says? People won't understand.
People will question me and make me question my decisions. There may have to be difficult conversations and difficult changes. Satan will try to put people and obstacles in my way. I will have to be bold; I will stand out; I will be different. I will have to be committed to changes and dedicated to making them. I cannot back down; I cannot succomb to people or pressures. I cannot worry. I will have to be committed to following the precedent and expectations set by one person Christ.
When I find myself coming back to the same feelings and the same thoughts, when it seems I am always questioning the same situations or decisions, when I have desires and they don't seem to be met, when relationships seem to be one way or growing but there is still something missing, when I feel I'm in a cycle and it breaks and then find myself right back in the cycle again, there is a reason. There is a reason the cycle isn't breaking; there is a reason my feelings keep returning. If my attempts to change are futile or if I think things have changed and then things return, there is a reason. The Lord doesn't desire us to have certain feelings, to think certain ways, to have certain relationships, to be certain places, but in His sovereignty allows and permits them until we ultimately desire for Him to reveal the truth to us and we align everything with Him, until then the cycle continues and our eyes remain veiled to the complete truth.
It is well....with my soul....six simple words, packed with a powerful truth that at times are impossible to say. Loss, it is inevitable. We will each experience it. It comes in various shapes, sizes, and forms. It can be physical, emotional, or mental. It can touch deep within your soul; it can reach you in places you never realized existed. And no matter how great or how small, it produces a pain and a hurt that is real, and this pain and this hurt can cause a doubting that none can comprehend, unless they have been there. We should not be surprised by loss, scripture clearly points toward suffering and pain, "And after you have suffered a little while," "Weeping may tarry for the night;" scripture after scripture reminds me, I WILL suffer loss.
Loss...what is it? It is the losing of something or someone that held some type of value to our lives, to who we are as a person. It can be something that may seem as menial as losing an item of clothing or a text book, or it can be something greater. Divorce, affairs, miscarriages, loss of a loved one, moving away, breaking up of relationships, a career ending injury, loss of a valuable piece of jewelry, fire, robbery, illness, dementia, loss of self because we have become like others, loss of a job, financial difficulties, loss of a child...I could continue listing. Each of us can think of a loss, a time where pain reigned and hurt was a way of life. It is inevitable..."And after you have suffered a little while," "Weeping may tarry for the night."
November 2006, my world changed, life as I knew it would never be the same, this was the beginning of a season of loss....I remember the phone call, the weight of the words on the other end of the line, my Grandmother had passed away suddenly, cardiac arrest, on the way to the hospital, alone in an ambulance, I remember the loneliness I felt in my home, I remember trying to fall back asleep on my sofa, I remember the doubt, the questions...loss, it brings a cloud over you. It is inevitable..."And after you have suffered a little while," "Weeping may tarry for the night."
Smiles, laughter, joy, crying, sleepless nights, dirty diapers, lots of them, all a part of the life of a newborn. A year to the day after my Grandmothers passing, November 16, 2007, I watched my brother-in-law carry a little white casket to the graveyard behind our church. A few days earlier, I remember, another phone call, I remember the weight of the words on the other end of the line, I remember thinking I was in the middle of a nightmare, I remember the wails, loneliness within my own home, a drive to a hospital that should have taken 40 minutes made in 20, I remember a week of tears, I remember the questions, the doubt....7 weeks is too little, Who would take an innocent child from their mother? Loss, it brings a weight, a heaviness to the soul. It is inevitable...."And after you have suffered a little while," "Weeping may tarry for the night."
There are losses you are able to prepare for, or at least be a little more prepared for. Within months of this picture, my family would suffer yet another loss, the loss of one of the greatest men I will ever know, my Granddaddy....summer 2010. I remember the daily routine of going by the nursing facility, I remember holding the tray to his mouth as he coughed up what was probably bile mixed with mucus, I remember helping him to the restroom, I remember sitting with him and watching his body slowly fade away, I remember walking out the door knowing it was the last time I would see him. I remember the phone ringing in the middle of the night, my mom's voice as she heard the news, the tears, he was gone, his chains were gone, he had been set free. Loss, it brings a sadness, it brings a longing. It is inevitable...."And after you have suffered a little while," "Weeping may tarry for the night."
Since my Grandmother's passing, my life has been a continuous season of loss, from the passing of loved ones, to financial difficulty, to moving two times in one year, to struggles in relationships with those I care the most, to other losses. Loss, it is inevitable. I have heard it said multiple times and in many different ways, there is no way the Lord would let "this" happen. There is no way a loving God could let bad things happen to His people. For a while, I wondered and questioned this same thought, this same idea, but as the losses piled, I ran to scripture. I had to know, in the depths of my soul, could a loving God allow such pain and hurt to happen to me, to anyone, and if He wasn't allowing it, then who was in control? Because I believed ultimately someone was ruling the earth, I believed ultimately someone had to be in control of every detail of every life...and as I read, and as I searched, scriptures began to pop from the pages, truth began to spring forth from the Word, my eyes saw and my heart believed. There is only One Person Who is sovereign, Who is reigning over every detail of my life. If the Lord Himself is not Sovereign, if the Lord Himself is not omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, if the Lord Himself does not hold every detail the happens to me in His hand and if everything that happens in my life does not pass through His fingers, then satan and his forces would have the power to reign over me, and I would rather know that my life was in the hands of the One Who created me, that whether it was good or bad, He was sovereign, I would rather know my God reigns over ALL than to even begin to think satan has the power to do and act as he pleases. Job clearly shows that satan can do NOTHING without the permission of my God, NOTHING. "There was a man in the land of Uz whose name was Job, and that man was blameless and upright, one who feared God and turned away from evil. The LORD said to Satan, “From where have you come?” Satan answered the LORD and said, “From going to and fro on the earth, and from walking up and down on it.” And the LORD said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job, that there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, who fears God and turns away from evil?” Then Satan answered the LORD and said, “Does Job fear God for no reason? Have you not put a hedge around him and his house and all that he has, on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. But stretch out your hand and touch all that he has, and he will curse you to your face.” And the LORD said to Satan, “Behold, all that he has is in your hand. Only against him do not stretch out your hand.” So Satan went out from the presence of the LORD."
None of us can comprehend the mind of Christ, none of us can begin to understand the Creator of the universe, the heavenly realms, the depths of hell. My finite mind can not even begin to comprehend the infinite mind of the Lord. Many may argue that a loving God can not allow suffering, can not allow pain, but I challenge anyone, if our God is not Sovereign, if He is not in control, then who is? We live in an evil world, look around, evil insnares us, it engulfs us, our minds are easily distracted, our hearts are easily torn, our lives are easily shattered, we live in a fallen world, satan and his forces are out searching the earth, like a roaring lion, and we will be touched by hurt, by pain, by suffering, by evil. I am not a great theologian, I am not a seminary graduate, but sometimes it is not about what books say, what man says, sometimes walking through hell and surviving is the only thing that sheds the truth, sometimes experience negates schooling. And this is what I have come to know, what I have come to believe, loss is inevitable, we will suffer loss! "And after you have suffered a little while," "Weeping may tarry for the night." But my loss does not compare to the loss my God suffered when He saw His Own Son hanging on a cross....that is the ultimate loss.And I have a hope...that NOTHING, no LOSS, can touch my life that does not pass through the hand of my Saviour. No matter how hard life is, no matter how many losses I experience, I have a HOPE, there is only ONE who is Sovereign. Satan can only do so much and he has already been defeated, read the last book he knows his time is limited and he knows his time to wreak havoc on this Earth is coming to a close. There are so many things we can not even begin to comprehend or understand, but even after the Lord allowed satan to take EVERYTHING from Job, even after the Lord allowed satan to test Job, Job still was able to worship, he was still able to stand with tears streaming down his face, with loss all around him, he was still able to fall on his knees and realize the hope he had, he was able to question, to hurt, to experience a pain like none other without sinning because he realized,"Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head and fell on the ground and worshiped. And he said, “Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.”In all this Job did not sin or charge God with wrong."
This journey is my own, my losses will be different than others, my pain will be different than others, none is greater than any other, but while loss is inevitable, we can walk through the valley...we can come out on the other side...and we can say "It is well....with my soul."
"It is well....with my soul....Though Satan should buffet, those trials shall come, Let this blessed assurance control, That Christ has regarded my helpless estate, and hath shed HIS OWN BLOOD FOR MY SOUL! It is well....with my soul!"
All it takes is a spark. We each have these desires that lie within us, these passions that we want filled, these visions and goals and dreams that we want to see the Lord take and make His own. We each have this spark inside of us, that if we are believers, is to bring glory to Him in all we say and do. But life takes a toll on us; life breaks us down, jobs, careers, family, friends, the world in general begin to dim the light; and the light and passion we had inside of us begins to fade. We see ourselves becoming more worldly and less like the Word. Our passion and our desires begin to be lost admits the desires of the world. Pain, hurt, turmoil fill our hearts, life happens. And then the Holy Spirit with His presence sees the spark that is still there, flickering in the depths of our hearts, and He begins to blow on it gently, as to not snuff it out, and He begins to put kindling around it through the Word, through song, through prayer, through communion with Him, and all of a sudden the spark grows into a small flame and the flame grows into a passionate fire. The Holy Spirit rained down from heaven in the form of fire at Pentecost and that fire and that power is within us as believers, as the body. He is inside of us desiring to be a burning presence in our lives. 
All it takes is a spark. Once someone has been touched by the love of Christ, it will linger with them, it will resonate with in them. Once you have experienced the love of the Father, you can not help but dwell in His presence, you can not help but to warm up in His arms, you can not help but to run to the warmth of His embrace. 
All it takes is a spark. For believers, there is no state of hopelessness. In the movie mentioned, one knew the men were hopeless. There was no happy ending, no hope for their future, but we as believers live in a state of hope. When things are failing around us, when life is happening, when we are standing in the middle of a room with chaos abounding, when our minds are questioning and doubting, we have a hope. It only takes a spark of hope to remember it is not about this day, it is about THAT day, it is not about being happy it's about being joyful, it is not about bringing glory to my name but to His name, it is not about whether I made the right or wrong decision but determining that I will make decisions from this day forth based on His Word not on this world. It only takes a spark to turn a life around for eternity.“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven."
